BYU will allow same-sex dancing at annual competition
Tyler Keith Wilson has danced in many ballroom competitions at Brigham Young University through the years, gliding with his partner over the glossy floors while she turned in a dress that looked like cotton candy.
The event will be historic for the conservative college, which is owned by The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. To host the coveted showcase, which it has every year since at least 1997, BYU was required to lift its ban keeping same-sex couples from competing this spring.
Now, the thousands of collegiate and studio dancers from across the country who come to show their skills will be able to dance with whomever they choose.
For the private school, that was a major concession. The change goes against its strict Honor Code forbidding gay relationships, as well as “all forms of physical intimacy that give expression to homosexual feelings.” Even in its own classes, BYU — one of the most renowned schools in the country for ballroom dance — doesn’t allow two men to dance together for practice.
But for Wilson, it represents a chance to finally be himself and choose his partner.
“This is everything,” he said. “For years, I haven’t danced how I’ve wanted to, with who I’ve wanted to. This is an event that will open people’s minds and change people’s concept of what dance looks like.”
It’s something he never thought would happen. Wilson had applied to BYU about 10 years ago, after receiving a scholarship to perform ballroom dance there. But during the required interview beforehand with a church leader, he said, he was told he couldn’t attend because he’s gay — even though he didn’t act on it, in accordance with the faith’s guidelines, and still danced only with female partners.
After that, he left the church and moved to New York to practice ballroom professionally. Now 27, Wilson is excited to return and make history where he was once rejected. Dancing with a man, he said, has just always felt more natural to him.
“And that’s what dance is about at the end of the day — it’s an expression of yourself and life.”
Article continues below
Fighting for inclusion
Ballroom dance has long been about tradition and rules, though. It began among the upper class in the 16th century, and it hasn’t shed much of its aristocratic origins. The community has clung especially tight to rigid gender roles.
“It’s all about the man and the lady,” Wilson said. “He leads and she follows. He wears a tail suit with a white bow tie and she’s in a ballgown.”
While some smaller dance groups have embraced different partnerships, the two largest ballroom organizations in the country have resisted any change — until last year.
Under the threat of a lawsuit and amid growing public pressure, the National Dance Council of America revised its policy in September so that “same-sex/gender neutral couples will be able to compete with opposite-sex couples in all dance genres included in championships, competitions and events sanctioned by the NDCA.” USA Dance, the other large organization, did the same.
In November — when registration was set to begin — BYU’s ballroom program made a surprise announcement on its competition website that it would forgo having the council officially sanction the event and would host it, instead, as simply “an all-amateur event” for collegiate and studio competitors. That way, it could create its own policies.
With no exceptions, BYU said, “A couple in the traditional Ballroom Dance genre is defined as a male and a female, with the male dancing the part of the lead and the female dancing the part of the follow.”
Crystal Song, a Ph.D. student in performance studies at the University of California, Berkeley, who researches ballroom dance, said that kicked off a monthslong fight over the rules. Many dancers posted online that they were disappointed by the decision. Others threatened to drop out if the NDCA rules weren’t observed.
“The school and the council have been couching all of this in this language of sanctions and regulations," Song said. "It was really, though, about homophobia and how long that has been a large part of the ballroom community.”
Song danced with another woman when she competed as an undergraduate in New York. But, she said, BYU has long been the model and “really definitive for standards in ballroom” across the country.
(Photo Courtesy of Mark A. Philbrick) A BYU Ballroom couple dances in this undated photo.
Lee Wakefield was previously the artistic director for BYU’s ballroom team before he retired in 2014; and he still holds his position as ballroom director for the NDCA. When asked by The Salt Lake Tribune for comment this week, he declined and referred questions back to the college.
The NDCA’s president, first vice president and second vice president all did not return calls either, nor did the dance department chair at BYU.
A quiet change
In a letter posted online, Wakefield said BYU was not required to follow the new NDCA rule allowing gender-neutral partnerships. The council turned off comments on the post.
Then, early this month, Katerina Lu and her dancing partner and husband of 19 years, Xingmin Lu, announced they would sit out the competition. The two are U.S. senior champions and have competed at BYU many times, winning multiple national titles.
Katerina Lu wrote on Facebook that even though she is not gay and dances in a traditional partnership, she believed BYU was discriminating against same-sex couples by not letting them perform. Any title awarded, then, would mean nothing to her if she wasn’t competing against all dancers and the best in the field.
“If you don’t let everybody who has the right to dance, then you’re not truly a national championship,” she told The Tribune this week. “You should be able to dance no matter your background, color or sexual orientation.”
It’s unclear what changed. The school’s spokeswoman, Carri Jenkins, responded to an email and noted only that, “in consultation with the leadership of the National Dance Council of America, it was determined that the magnitude of the competition at BYU warranted a full sanction, which requires adherence to all NDCA rules and regulations.”
Now, for the first time ever, the school will allow two men or two women to dance together on its floors.
The rule will apply to the competition, overall, and those coming in from out of state, but BYU’s own standards haven’t changed. Students who attend classes there will still not be able to dance in same-sex partnerships.
‘Good dancing is good dancing’
“They were making it about religion," he said, “instead of dance.”
Many see the school’s decision as a positive sign, though, including Chicago duo Alex Tecza and Kato Lindholm. They started as a traditional couple and then moved to same-sex dancing after Lindholm, who is transgender, transitioned. As professionals, they won’t qualify for BYU’s amateur competition, but they welcome the change.
“We have been advocating for same-sex inclusion in ballroom dancing for some time,” Tecza said. “It seems like there is a sense of fairness and justice going on around in waves around the dance world.”
Lindholm added: “From our standpoint, we think technique is technique and good dancing is good dancing, regardless of the couple.”
Some have questioned whether having two men compete together is unfair in a sport that merits strength and form. In ballroom, a man is the lead, wearing a tuxedo and no embellishment while a woman follows his directions in a gown and exaggerated makeup. It’s at least partly about machismo and submission to it.
Song, the Ph.D. researcher, said some of that is changing as ballroom welcomes same-sex partners interested in challenging and re-creating the norms.
“It’s definitely an important step,” she said. “Even as more queer people become part of the ballroom space, a lot of it is still defined by that old image. And that’s been hard for people to let go of. I hope it’s part of a bigger conversation in the ballroom community.”
It’s already happening on a worldwide stage.
“It also helps to break down some of the really difficult stereotypes — not just in dance, but in society,” said Mark Hakes, who dances with his male partner, Elijah Jensen, in Minnesota.
The two have been doing ballroom together for three years and also applaud BYU for allowing same-sex couples. “It’s fantastic," Hakes added. “It means my partner and I can dance together.”
Hakes and others believe it doesn’t have to be the exception to see same-sex couples flow across the floor together. Benjamin Soencksen, the president of the North American Same-Sex Partner Dance Association, said it’s not about aesthetic but reinventing who and when dance can be flowery or active or bold or even switch in the middle of a routine.
“It doesn’t come as a surprise that the organizers in Utah grappled with this and ultimately relented,” Soencksen suggested.
For Wilson, he’s never felt comfortable being in the lead position and enjoys being more feminine in his movements. He found a male dance partner in December and is learning now how to follow.
“Not everyone falls into those two boxes,” he said. “To be able to show myself for who I am is just going to be so liberating. I don’t have to be too girly. I can just be Tyler.”
It feels like “full circle,” he noted, for him to return to BYU now, being able to show who he is and dance how he wants. For years, he’s been putting the pain he experienced being rejected by the school and struggling with being gay into his choreography.
“It’s going to be a big shock for the people who are used to seeing classic ballroom,” he added. “I’m excited to see their reactions.”
At the school’s competition in March, there will be 3,000 couples competing. Wilson plans to be there in a tuxedo, standing across from his partner in another tuxedo.
BYU’S LGBTQ POLICIESThe debate over same-sex ballroom dance couples competing at Brigham Young University is not the first time the school has faced pushback for its LGBTQ policies. But it is one of the few times it has changed to be more accommodating.
Most recently, in November, two science societies removed BYU job postings from their sites after they said anyone hired would have to abide by the school’s Honor Code ban on “homosexual behavior.” The university stood by its policy — and it can, as a private and religious institution.
In April 2018, a national political science group apologized for holding its annual conference at BYU, saying it gave “insufficient forethought to matters of diversity.” The school didn’t refund the contract after the organization ended up moving off campus as many of the lectures as it could.
In 2016, a group of national LGBTQ advocacy coalitions — including Athlete Ally and the National Center for Lesbian Rights — advocated for the Big 12 athletic conference to keep BYU out over its policies. The school made no changes.
'Competition is the spice of life' - DWTS producer unfazed by rivals The Masked Singer and Dancing on Ice
Mr Bass, who produces Dancing With The Stars for RTE One, spoke in the wake of the early success of the new ITV show.
Its first episode attracted a staggering 5.5 million viewers.
The new series of Dancing On Ice, another British show, will also be aired on Sundays, a direct competitor for Dancing With The Stars.
"Competition is the spice of life," Mr Bass said.
"It makes you up your game and sharpen your pencil.
"That is why we have upped a lot of things for this year, so bring it on."
When asked if he hoped Virgin Media would bring back Ireland's Got Talent, Mr Bass, CEO of the ShinAwil production company, said: "These are big shows. They're expensive shows.
"It's something that in the current climate, obviously the resources maybe don't stretch that far, but hopefully they will be back."
The TV executive said if Virgin Media "wants to get an audience", it needs to be competitive with shows.
"If you don't have the right programmes on, people won't listen or watch," he said.
The Masked Singer has completely flipped on its head the format of a reality talent show, by staging a top-secret singing competition in which stars compete against each other and appear in costumes with face masks to conceal their identities.
"It (The Masked Singer) did very well," he said.
"It's very early doors. We'll wait and see. Like a lot of these shows, you need to see how they will sustain over a period of time and if you're looking for a show to replace dancing, it needs to show that hits all the demographics, all the age groups, and sustain for 12 weeks, over two hours.
"That isn't an easy ask, so I think The Masked Singer is a really good, fresh show.
"It has a fresh trick.
"It was very similar to when I watched The Voice the first time and saw the chairs spinning around.
"But let's see how it sustains, because with The Voice, there was an issue with it after you went through the blind auditions - it really did tail and it was the same as every other talent show.
"The Masked Singer is very different. If that show is going to be successful globally, they would have to find a way to do it outside of the markets, outside the US and the UK."
Herald
5 Reasons to Be Real: Authenticity is the New Competitive Edge
Clients, customers, and employees all share one unique quality: being human. As human beings, we know when someone is being genuine as opposed to speaking “corporate talk,” mouthing the words that relegate us to being a number rather than an individual.
We know the difference between rote, systematic adherence to policies and procedures and addressing personal needs with interest and compassion. We know when someone is being authentic. We know when they’re being real.
One of the greatest competitive edges in business today is authenticity. Professionals and companies that encourage practices based on this authentic truth immediately differentiate themselves from the competition.
The Strategy: Be Your True Self
In life, as in business, our feelings impact our decisions. Years ago, when purchasing an automobile, I decided to avoid the tumultuous dance of a salesperson having to “check with the manager” over and over again to win the sale. Before walking into the dealership, I put time into research and was competent and knowledgeable about my purchase. Rather than go through the car-buying tug of war, I gave my price and said, “Take it or leave it.”
Since that time, I’ve incorporated this method into many areas of my life. Today, this take-it-or-leave-it strategy has transformed into “Here is my true self. Accept me or not.”
For many years, I played the part of who I thought others wanted me to be: the high performer, successful executive, strong male figure, breadwinner, husband, and father. Years of subduing my true self brought only unhappiness and a sense of dread. I felt a falseness that others would pick up on, a constant undercurrent in our interactions. When I was able to start sharing my real self as a unique and loving person, people around me began to have a very different experience.
Recommended For You Webcast, March 5th: How AI Can Find Opportunities and Shorten Your Sales CyclesRegister Now
While better products, improved customer service, and operational excellence are important attributes for a successful organization, authenticity separates the “good” from the “amazing.” It’s at the heart of the work we center on in supporting our clients and the companies they lead. Dare to be honest. Build strong ethics and integrity for yourself and your organization. Authenticity changes the playing field in a big way.
Here are five reasons to gain this competitive edge:
1. Authenticity ignites human connection
Human beings are highly complex, superconductive, electromagnetic miracles. The flow of positive energy increases when we are honest and genuine. You are never better, stronger, more creative, or compelling than when you are your true self. The energy you possess and emit connects you with your employees, your customers, and those you care for.
2. Authenticity opens the door to vulnerability — and unity
When we are vulnerable, we drop the false trappings of title, status, and formality. Human beings want to connect. Living in a way that’s open and honest, even while acknowledging your shortcomings and mistakes, is life-affirming and builds unity. Great leaders show their humanness, dropping the corporate guard and standing with those being led.
3. Authenticity allows you to learn about others, including your customers
If you live your life on the fringes—always being afraid of opening up, letting fear be the guide as opposed to love and compassion—you miss out on the wonderful experience of learning and knowing others on a deeper, more meaningful level. Being authentic creates room for others to do the same. Leadership is best delivered by modeling what you seek from others.
4. Authenticity moves you into the present
When you decide to show up as the real you, you have consciously moved into present, into a realm of real-time connections. Here, you are better able to make informed and enlightened choices, ones that uplift you and others. When you live in the present, you experience one interaction at a time despite the disruptive nature of a rapidly evolving digital world.
5. Authenticity changes your world perspective
When you no longer need to hide behind what others want you to be, say, or do, you put aside falseness and lies and open up to a world of endless and positive opportunities. Try it. You just might like it. Step into the full version of yourself.
**Originally published at Real Leaders
Author: Michael Bianco-Splann
Michael Bianco-Splann is a conscious leadership expert, inspirational speaker, and master certified corporate trainer with over 30 years of frontline executive experience. He offers a transformative approach to leadership—within Fortune 100 companies to small boutique enterprises—for those seeking a life that’s true to one’s passion and purpose. He… View full profile ›
No comments:
Post a Comment